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sometimes i think it's it's harder if

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you think about how you're different and

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you can think that maybe being different

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is bad

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being different is great and you should

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really rejoice in those differences and

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you should realize that whoever you are

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whatever you bring

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it's important

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at first i didn't really have a name for

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it i didn't know why and what was going

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on i was i think like

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like many of us very confused because

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the the messages that

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we get from around us are that you know

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we're supposed to be heterosexual

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my friends

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began to

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go through their experiences and mostly

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be attracted to girls and i was not i

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couldn't really define myself as lgbt

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tea in particular

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until i was in my 20s it wasn't like a i

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think i'm gay it's no i know it but i

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just knew that that was probably

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different than something i better keep

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to myself

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i didn't know what the reactions will be

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i didn't want anybody to not like me

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so i just kept silent about my inner

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feelings and

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just kept the door shut i didn't know

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anybody else in my position and i didn't

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know who to talk to and i even heard

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rumors about other kids in high school

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and i was

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terrified to even mention anything to

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them for fear that maybe those rumors

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were not true

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and that they would start to spread

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things about me a classmate of mine when

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i was freshman in high school

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was rumored to be dating a senior girl

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and

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that

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her car was vandalized and i found it it

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and i remember

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going to talk to a counselor about my

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feelings

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being very upset about that and

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she looked me in the eye and told me

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that

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different

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which helped me to understand

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that my questions and my feelings needed

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to stay very

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very deep inside of me

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i recall actually a particular group of

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kids

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in seventh grade who who took it upon

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themselves to just torment me on the bus

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it got bad enough that i started lying

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to my parents saying that i'd missed the

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bus and

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i would just watch it drive away and

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he got bullied

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he didn't fit in

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eventually he dropped out of high school

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and left home

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it was

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really hard to feel that i was the only

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person in the world that didn't make

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sense

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all my relationships

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at that time in my life were all based

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on this lie that

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that

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you start to become well i did

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kind of became two people an external

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susan who tried to be what everybody

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wanted her to be and then a very

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internal susan

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who was very private and and kept a lot

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of emotions and feelings

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to myself

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i finally said i can't do this anymore

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let me just go to a meeting see what

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it's like i made a decision that i

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wasn't going to hide who i was

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because you know college was already a

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more progressive place to be and

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it was important to me that i actually

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lived the rest of my life

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like i should i started coming out to

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friends

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in the local area basically just by

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showing up

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as my new self

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in girls clothes

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and

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everyone was very accepting a little bit

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confused

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and that got me the courage to tell my

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parents and in that moment though

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i also realized

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that if she was going to have

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the courage

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to be who she was and and to be out

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that if i was going to be the kind of

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mom that she deserved

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i had that courage too

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i just started crying and

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told my dad

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and he said oh of course we love you you

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know we just we didn't know

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we just said that kind of thing just

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because that's how we were raised we

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don't actually think it's awful

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before my dad passed

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we got to a good place

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and my mom is still alive and she and i

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are very close and

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she's very accepting of

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who i am um and i would say very proud

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of who i am

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and it was it was liberating it was

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they've known all this time but they

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still liked me i i guess they were

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waiting for me to tell them

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and it was like a weight had been lifted

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off my shoulders

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and soon i you know circled myself

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around loving people that just accept me

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for who i was

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if you find someone that you're very

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comfortable with you're friends with

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sometimes you just have to take that

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leap of faith and you've got to talk to

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them and be real with them

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just take a deep breath and

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just it's just very simple to say i

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am gay

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all you have to say every day from that

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point forward of making

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the decision to step out into the

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unknown and come out and share what my

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world is and my truth

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is where things started to get better

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and

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after that

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every day going forward has been better

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still

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once i found the lgbt community at my

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campus and started going to their events

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and seeing what an awesome group of

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people they were and how accepting

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everyone is that's when it started

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really getting better not everybody's

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there yet and that's okay people should

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be

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as public as they feel comfortable i

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think you have to love yourself

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realize that you're a good person

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realize what you have to offer to the

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world there are people who want to be

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there for you and who want you to be

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yourself

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you just have to reach out to them find

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a counselor a neighbor someone who you

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trust you need to surround yourself with

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a lot of supportive friends and family

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i've seen people becoming more and more

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open-minded and bit different so you

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know to embrace

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people that they don't look or behave

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exactly like them

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well i think things are getting better

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because more people are realizing it's

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not a big deal at all it's fine it's the

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way people are

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it almost doesn't matter anymore it's

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just

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who i am it's one part of who i am not

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everything about who i am and so

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i get to live comfortably

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at work at home

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and with my family

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even in church

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being who i am and that's that's

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everything

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it's just becoming the new normal

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where

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you're just

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defined by your character and not by who

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you love

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being gay doesn't necessarily define you

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it's just one factor of who you are

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here at nasa i'm able to be an engineer

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i'm able to be gay i'm accepted

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even love these men and women come from

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all walks of life

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different ethnicities and different

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orientations

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embrace yourself for who you are be

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proud of who you are accept yourself

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because there is a place for you in this

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world

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just hang in there it does get better it

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gets great even it gets better it gets

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better it gets better it gets better it

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does get better it gets better it does

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get better it really does

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it really does get better

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it gets

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a whole lot better

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it absolutely gets better and it gets so

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much better and you can't even realize

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how much better it gets until you

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until you've seen it until you've done

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it

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i'm ellen ochoa director of the nasa

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johnson space center

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i want you to know that here at johnson

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space center teamwork is one of our

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greatest assets and that means we value

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the skills and talents of every

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individual regardless of differences

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including sexual orientation or gender

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identity

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if you're going through difficult times

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right now

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be patient and give yourself time to

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overcome the hardships and i promise

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that life will get

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i'm george takei